Category: Relationship

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5 amazing ways you should Love your partner this Valentine

Valentine’s 2021 is here! A time to spread love and be loved. That is why I’m glad you’re reading this post on ways you should love your partner this Valentine.

If you’re a lovey dovey person like me and you’re excited about Valentine’s, please don’t let any killjoy kill your excitement by saying things like “there’s nothing special about Val’s” and “Everyday is a day to spread love”.

Yes, love should be celebrated every day but same with life. Why don’t we stop celebrating birthdays just because we celebrate life everyday?

Be excited about Valentine’s and go all out to celebrate it if it’s within your means.
Life is too short to be holding back.

If you’re in a relationship or married, you should be looking forward to stepping up your game in the love department and topping you partner’s love tank by looking into new ways you should love your partner this Valentine.
And if you’re single, you are not left out. Self love is the best kind of love after God’s Love. Read this blog post to get ideas on how to spend your Valentines as a single person.

Single, taken, or married, you shouldn’t spend Vals sulking or being unhappy. Give love and receive love.
Below are 5 ways you should love your partner this Valentine’s and they’re coined from the 5 love languages.
Pay attention to your partner’s love language(s).
To be honest, you should do this all the time in your relationship.

However, there are times when due to circumstances, you may be unable to speak your partner’s love language AKA love them the way they like to be loved. This Val is a great time to fix that and make up for time past.


1. Get thoughtful presents
Everyone loves presents. Even if I had everything I needed and wanted, I would still appreciate gifts. Many times, it’s not really about the material (sometimes it is lol), it’s usually about the thought behind it, and the priceless special feeling your partner feels when they receive presents from you.
So, go online and search for Valentine’s 2021 gift ideas.

Don’t close your eyes to all the vendors marketing Val’s gifts to you. If you can afford it, get it for your partner. Choose a package that allows you select the content of the Val presents and select things you know your partner would appreciate.

If prior to now, your finances haven’t allowed you do much of giving gifts, this is the time to squeeze something out of your savings and get your partner some presents.


2. Give them quality time!
If your partner’s love language is quality time and you’re always very busy, create time to spend with them this Val. Surprise them.
Especially if it is a marriage relationship. Postpone anything that may want to come up and take your time on Valentine’s day.
Better still, if it’s really important, carry your partner along.


3. Hold your partner
If your partner’s love language is physical touch, be more generous with your hands this season through hugs, and holding of hands (but go easy on this one if y’all aren’t married yet).




4. Tell your partner how much they mean to you.
Word of affirmation is powerful. Sometimes, all people need is reassurance.
Be vocal about how much you love them and how much they mean to you. Send thoughtful texts, customize cards with your original thoughts, communicate to your partner that they’re important to you.


5. Do something random but thoughtful.
Acts of service really get to some people. This is the season to practice that more. It could something as little as taking out the trash, doing the dishes, working on a project on behalf of your partner, or ticking some things off their to-do list for them.
These things may seem small but they usually mean a whole lot to the recipients.




Look into these 5 actions and let them inspire you on new ways to love your partner this Valentine’s.
Want to go steps further, do all of the above! Lol. Love is never too much

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Single on Valentine’s? How to spend Valentine’s Day alone

Have you been wondering how to spend Valentine’s Day alone?

Yes, it’s Cupid season and love is everywhere in the air, it’s almost palpable.
Everything is in pair now, even your socks.
For a single person, this can be frustrating because everywhere you look, you seem to be reminded of the fact that you’re not in a relationship or married.

However, I’m here to tell you that being single on Valentine’s day can actually be a very very great thing.
Remember what they say about life being 5% what happens to you and 95% how you react and handle it? Yes. Being single on Valentine’s day is a normal thing happening to tons of people around the world right now.

You can either make it something to be very angry and frustrated about or something really amazing for yourself.
It’s all about how you handle it.

So if you’ve been upset about spending Valentine’s Day alone, maybe you need to change your perspective to it all. And I’m here to help you with that.

Being single on Valentine’s day may not actually be as bad as you think. Besides, it is better to be alone and single on Valentine’s than to be in a toxic relationship that is not good for you.

So whether you’re spending Valentine’s Day alone because you’re single or because your partner is very far away, these tips below will help you make the most of the day and spend it happy.

How to spend Valentine’s Day alone


1. Refuse to be intimidated
You have to be intentional about not letting pictures of couples and love posts everywhere on social media get to you. The pressure is real so you must create systems to ensure you’re not under unnecessary pressure.

If social media gets to you easily and throws you into unhealthy competition and comparison, then you should regulate your social media consumption for that day.
Don’t continue scrolling through the “From me and mine” posts on Instagram or you’ll soon find yourself calling your toxic ex and making a terrible mistake.


2. You are your lover
If you had a lover, what would you do for them? Take them out? Buy presents, say sweet words to them? Reassure them of your love and commitment to them?
Write these down and do them for yourself!

You are responsible for your own happiness. Make yourself happy by doing everything you would have done for your partner or you would have wanted your partner to do for you.

Take care of yourself and shower all the love on you.


3. Self care
This is continuation of the point above.
You have to use February 14th to take care of yourself. You can do this in many ways; organize a spa day for yourself at home, order some of your favorite snacks and drinks, do some of your favorite aerobics workout, get some sleep, see a nice comedy movie, do something for you!


4. Call your loved ones.
What better day is there to reach out to your loved ones than a day of love? Call your siblings, friends, cousins, parents. Make a video call and catch up with them.

5. Give
Love is expressed through giving. You can plan ahead and get presents for the people in your life. You don’t have to be in a relationship to get presents for someone on Valentine’s day.
That purse your sister has always wanted? Get it for her.
That toy your baby cousin loves, get it for them. Buy presents for your parents, get something nice for your neighbor, give some cash present to your security man.
Let people around you feel love.


6. Organize a get together with your other single friends
You’d be surprised that you are not as alone as you thought. You have 3 or 4 friends who are also wondering how to spend Valentine’s Day alone. Reach out to them and ask if they’d be free to attend a get together. Plan something small at a great location, preferably one of you’s houses. Going to a restaurant may not be a great idea because of the number of paired up people that will be everywhere.
Plan the get together for your friends place or your place and make it fun.

7. Start something new
Sometimes, the greatest things in our lives are started “accidentally”. Some days ago, I read of a millionaire blogger who started her blog some years ago on Valentine’s day because her husband was far away and she was alone on Valentine’s day.
She decided to try something new and viola! This “something new” is now a full time job that pays well.
This year’s Valentine’s may just be what you need to get started on that idea.


8. Volunteer, support, and spread love
You’re not the only one spending Valentine’s alone. There are people out there who are not receiving love from anyone at all. People in orphanages, shelters, hospitals.
You can use that day to visit them, show them love, and make them smile.


You can also support small businesses around you, if it is within your means. Patronize me by buying my love and gratitude journal to document the great things in your life that you’re grateful for.
Volunteer. Support. Give love.

9. Spend time with God.
This is actually the best way to spend Valentine’s Day. You may not agree but it is.
Have you been struggling to create time for your quiet time? February 14th is here. Use it!
God loves you and would love to go on a date with you on Valentine’s day.
Make Jesus Christ your Val.


You don’t have to be sad and depressed just because you’re alone on Valentine’s day. You can be the happiest person.

Understanding that no one ka responsible for your happiness is key. Get hold of this understanding and let it make you look inward more.
Try some of the ideas I shared above and create for yourself the best Valentine’s Day yet.

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Do I really want to get married? Does a believer have to get married? Let us have this honest conversation.

Apart from the fact that in Nigeria, once you conclude a certain level of formal education, you are expected to get married and start a family of your own, what other reason do you have for wanting to get married?

Last week, the thoughts of marriage filled my mind. It didn’t just sprout out of nowhere. It was initiated by different things; social media posts, wedding pictures everywhere, discussions with people, etc.

I had had a discussion with a senior colleague who was encouraging me to get married in school since I am running a 6-year course, the country is making it longer than 6 years already, and many of my mates aren’t waiting anymore. They’re getting married.

The conversation was an interesting one. This senior colleague of mine is a good conversationalist. He almost made me start considering getting married the next week because of the great points he raised and how fun he made marriage sound. He was very convincing. Lol.

It’s funny how this happened just last week. And this week, I am in an entirely different mental space. A space where I’m asking myself why I want to get married and if marriage is necessary.

Just last week, I wanted to tie the nuptial knot so bad. This week, I’m asking myself if I really want to do this marriage thing and why.

I honestly believe that it is super important for every single person to get to this point where they ask themselves this question and answer it honestly.

A young lady asked me a question sometime last year. She wanted to know if marriage was compulsory and if women have to get married to fulfil purpose. I answered in the negative of course. Giving her scriptural backing and examples.

The only thing that is a do or die affair is salvation. Not marriage.

Marriage is not a criteria or prerequisite for heaven.

Even purpose. Unless your purpose/assignment is directly linked to marriage, and having children, you can fulfil purpose without getting married.

Don’t get me wrong. Marriage is good, beautiful, and very beneficial. But not for everyone.

Marriage is a big deal. A huge one. An enormous commitment.

It requires a lot of intentionality, practical Christianity, and work.
Add this to the fact that a large percentage of women, especially in my part of the world, become worse versions of themselves when they get married. Was this God’s intention? Absolutely not.

Marriage is an adumbration of the union between Christ and the church. We know that that union is a beautiful one that benefits the bride in amazing ways.
But when we begin to see that the version of marriage around us is one that leaves us in a terrible state, we need to dissect it and look into it. And not just rush into it because it looks like what everyone is doing and what is expected of us.

Does a believer have to get married?

If you do not want to get married, scripture is clear on that. You do not have to.

But if you want to get married, I think it is really important for you to ask yourself why.

Why do I want to get married?
Answering this question will help you better prepare, plan, and choose a partner wisely.

Even though Apostle Paul recommends that people who desire marriage, get married so that they don’t “burn” (be consumed in passion, continually battle with lust), I think that sex should not be your only reason for getting married.

It just isn’t a strong enough reason.

Plus, making that your only or primary reason will cloud your judgement, make you hasty, and may leave you disappointed.

God created marriage for companionship, support, procreation, and intimacy.

But He didn’t say that marriage would be a walk in the park, without issues and differences. No, He didn’t.

In fact, in the first marriage that the Bible shows us, there were issues. Issues so big that led to our need for redemption.

If two people who had no parents, were created by God, and placed in the same garden could have differences to the point of throwing blames at each other, (Gen 3:12), it is not very wise to expect a perfect relationship void of differences with someone who has different parents, orientation, perspective, and personality from you.

Living with someone and choosing to be committed to them will be challenging sometimes. Apostle Paul stated one of his reasons for encouraging people to stay unmarried in 1 Corinthians 7:28 GNB.

Marriage is beautiful and can be very enjoyable but it can not complete or fulfil you, if you aren’t already complete in God and yourself.

It also comes with its responsibilities;
Do you want it?
Are you ready to put in the work?
Do you have someone worth going on that journey with? (Because trust me, not everyone is worth it. When you look closely at some people’s behavior, and tendencies, you’d rather remain single and burn than go on a lifelong commitment with them).

Do you want to get married? Tell me why in the comments below. If you don’t, I’d love to know why too!