Couple Goals?… Or not. Be careful what you pray for


A few days ago, a very dear mentor shared something that made me pause and reflect. She was talking about a YouTuber called Cydnee who has beautiful blue eyes. Everyone who watches Cydnee’s channel loves her eyes so much that they always compliment it and even wish they had it. It was on recently that Cydnee did a video explaining why she has blue eyes. Apparently, the blue eyes were as result of a genetic defect called Waardenburg syndrome that causes loss of pigments in the eyes, skin and hair. That’s not the end of it. This genetic effect also has a side effect which is hearing loss.

This mentor of mine ended by saying something profound. In her words, “So, yes she has beautiful blue eyes but she’s also deaf in one ear. So be informed before you wish for all sorts.”

This right here is what made me decide to take this blog post from my drafts and share it with the world.

Aren’t we fond of wishing for stuff we know absolutely nothing about?

It’s no news to my blog readers that I am a helpless romantic. Everyone around me knows this. Seeing two people committed to each other in love, gives me joy. Seeing them sacrifice for each other, love each other and be kind to each other makes me smile.

But there is a new trend among we millennials that we need to examine. A trend that involves getting too involved with happy couples on social media and wishing to have what they have.

Young people just see really beautiful images or videos of couples and all they think of and type is “Couple Goals”, “I wish I had this”, ” I’m praying for a husband like yours”, or a marriage like this. etc.

Please we need to go easy on that.

How do you just see a beautiful picture or a possibly scripted video and decide that it’s what you want for your life? Do you know what these people put up with behind closed doors?
I am not saying that all couples who post online aren’t genuinely happy, but we definitely know that there is no marriage that is void of challenges. Their challenge may not be one you can handle, why are you trying to carry a cross that isn’t yours?

In recent times, quite a number of very celebrated celebrity marriages have failed due to all sorts of evils. Things we had no idea they were battling with while putting up a show for us on social media.

While you were loving them and wishing for what they had, they were going through stuff and almost just flatmates or strangers living under the same roof.

Seeing only the superficial aspect of something and desiring the whole package is not very wise. Literally nobody will take a picture of themselves crying in a bad marriage or a video of themselves arguing and fighting. No.

It’ll always be the highlights and the happy times. Always.
Words are very powerful, so don’t think saying “I want a marriage like this” will just disappear into thin air.

It’s okay to love couples you see around and online. But instead of wishing and praying for what they have, how about you appreciate them, love their pictures but pray for the marriage that God wants for you. A marriage that is yours and not another’s.

Pray for a marriage that will bring you peace and true happiness. One that mirrors God actual model of marriage; Christ and the Church. A spouse that will be a forgiver and a giver. A marriage that will be built on God and will stand the test of time and storms. A marriage that will draw you closer to God, making you grow deeper in the love of the Father. A marriage where you do not have to pretend because joy actually flows. A marriage where you both submit to each other and to God in love. A marriage that will not end in premium tears but will be filled with joy and peace in the Holy Ghost.

Why not change your prayer point today. The next time you see your “couple goals”, love them without coveting.
God has something beautiful for you too but you definitely won’t get it by wanting someone else’s.

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24 Comments

  1. Is your mentor Tosin Alabi because I saw this exact post on her inststory the other day. And yes well said, We need to stop “God when-ing” to everything.

    1. Yes, she is.
      Also, you didn’t see this exact post on her story, you saw the short narration I gave at the beginning of this post
      😊❤

      1. Thanks for this, I have always celebrate people’s success and marriages but one thing I usually pray for it’s my own never wished for theirs but God’s plan for mine

  2. I strongly agree with this… I once told someone I had no couple goals, yes I admire the beautiful pictures and all, It also doesn’t mean there’s a “very bad side” to these marriages or relationships but then you never can tell…
    Few months ago before the Will and Jada smith story, a very prominent person on my CL posted Will and Jada’s pictures, she’s married too and yes the post was all about her adoring Will and Jada Smith and how they were her couple goals etc… but just last month, we all know what happened- The Entanglement of course…

    It’s very important to be cautious before wishing for peoples kind of marriages and relationships and successes simply because of beautiful pictures and all… Sometimes there’s more to these than meets the eyes

    1. On point!
      So true.
      Wow! So many people adored Will and Jada’s marriage. We need to be very careful. There’s usually more than meets the eye.
      Thank you Mary

  3. Wow this is so on point ma,just of recent i coveted a couple’s marriage but now i know better, thank you ma for allowing God to use you to bless me and every other reader on this blog

  4. Thank you for the post ma’am. I strongly agree with you. It’s important we pray for the marriage God has for us not wishing to have what others other.

  5. A nice article and wish to add that some desire and pray for what they are not in position to pay it’s prize. My people say that good soup it is money that makes it. Moreover, some pray to have a wonderful, loving and caring man or woman as husband or wife but are not bothered to ensure that they are wonderful, loving and caring themselves. What you pray and wish to have especially in marriage, prepare and be ready and willing to pay the prize associated with that thing.

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