The world has different pictures of what an “ideal relationship” is and should be. Everyone seems to know what is required to maintain a great relationship.
Christians in love relationships ought to know that they’re different. They can’t subscribe and conform to the world’s description of “dating”.
As much as we’d love to go with everything trending, we have a blueprint and a template in the Bible.
This doesn’t mean Christian relationships are boring and no fun or that they’re rigid, monotonous and the same. No.
In fact, they’re very interesting, fun and fulfilling.
God is love so it’s only wise that His Word be our reference for Love related issues.
That you and your partner are Christians doesn’t make you both perfect. Neither does it mean the relationship will be without challenges or that your effort isn’t needed to make things work.
Painfully, I’ve watched many people in love relationships who love God and each other go their separate ways due to “unreconcilable differences”. Fights and disagreement that could have been avoided or sorted out led to huge messes that eventually erupted into something that couldn’t be fixed.
I’m not a relationship expert but from God’s Word, books I’ve read and people I’ve seen, I’ve coined out major ingredients that are very essential for a Christian relationship to thrive and scriptures in line.
Yes, you can have a happy Godly relationship with someone who loves God as much you do.
It is important you read this if you’re in a relationship to make things better and if you’re not to plan ahead.
Apart from passionately loving your partner, here are few very important keys you must know.
As you read, may your spirit he receptive and open to learn and make corrections.
Love God FIRST
A lot of people cry to God for partners, someone they can worship God and serve the purposes of His kingdom with, but as soon as that person comes walking into their life, guess what happens?
Yes, you guessed right. God is taken to the back seat.
How do you expect your “GODLY” relationship to thrive without GOD?
Matthew 22 37-39NIV
Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’This is the first and greatest commandment.And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’
Nothing and nobody should come before God, not even your partner.
Your time for God shouldn’t decrease because you got into a relationship.
Scrolling through your phone looking at their pictures shouldn’t replace flipping through your Bible to know the mind of God.
Night calls shouldn’t replace your quiet time and prayer time.
God wants you to love selflessly but He must come first in your heart and that of your partner. He is a jealous God.
When you get so caught up in the euphoric atmosphere of “being in love” that you forget God, it is only a matter of time before that love begins to fade and wane.
Relationships are all about giving. The Bible tells us that God so loved the world and as a result of the love He has for us, He GAVE His only begotten son.
No relationship can thrive without sacrificial giving. You can’t always have enough for two and that is where sacrifice comes in.
The greatest proof of love is sacrifice.
Time, money, ego and more will have to be laid down for the sake of your partner. Sacrifice involves putting your partner first.
1 John 3:16 NIV: This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters.
The name of your partner should not only be in your mouth when you want to tell people of the amazing things they do. Their name should always be mentioned in your prayers.
Always pray for your partner.
They may be going through things they can’t discuss with you or fighting battles they don’t want to bother you with. Always stand in the gap and intercede. Your prayers can avert dangers they didn’t even know were looming above them.
Always pray for your relationship.
The Devil hates to see anything that looks good for God’s Kingdom so he can send in little seeds and vices in an attempt to destroy what you’re building. When you’re ignorant of his devices, little things will creep in and all of a sudden, you “don’t feel too right” about it anymore.
“Accountability is willingness to explain your actions” – Dr Mike Murdock.
I was under a teaching during the week and the speaker said he’d been trying to teach his lady about accountability.
He said accountability starts from the little things like explaining why you missed your partner’s call or why you’re late for your meeting or date.
Being accountable, entails you acknowledging that you can’t do things anyhow and explaining why when you do.
(Note that I’m not talking about abuse, harmful habits or toxic relationships)
Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace. (Ephesians 4:2-3, NLT),
Many people expect perfection from others so they begin to complain and feel uncomfortable when the flaws of their partner is revealed to them.
Nobody is perfect even if they’re Christians. That your partner loves God does not make them God.
They’ll love you enough to work on certain traits you’re not comfortable with but you must also love them enough to put up with other flaws that they can’t seem to get rid of.
And learn to let go.
1 Peter 4:8NIV: Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.
If any party lacks the ability to forgive in a relationship, the end of the relationship is very near. Sometimes, don’t ask questions, just forgive and let go.
Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. (Ephesians 4:32, NASB)
Matt 18:19ESV:Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven.
20ESV:For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”
Praying together is a great form of intimacy.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8Love is patient.
Love is kind.
Love does not envy,
Love does not boast,
Love is not proud.
Lovedoes not dishonor others,
Love is not self-seeking,
Love is not easily angered,
Love keeps no record of wrongsLove does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
Lovealways protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.Love never fails.
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