Over the past few weeks, the number of stories and cases of premarital sex I’ve heard is quite high. Even amongst the least likely people.
But I’ve always said and we see from scriptures that when you become one with Christ, you are new and cease to act like every other person.
You are no longer led by trends and patterns of the world but by the Spirit of God. So even when the whole world is involved in a practice, that should not move you
Stop imitating the ideals and opinions of the culture around you, but be inwardly transformed by the Holy Spirit through a total reformation of how you think. This will empower you to discern God’s will as you live a beautiful life, satisfying and perfect in his eyes. Romans 12:2 TPT
I never have and will never be judgemental about things like this, however, God’s standards do not change and without mincing words, I’d like to start by saying that God is not in support of any kind of sex outside marriage. Premarital sex is fornication and extramarital sex is adultery. Both of these are sins and are not of God. It is God’s will that we stay chaste until marriage.
Apart from the Biblical aspects, there are other downsides to fornicate that range from pregnancy, to clouded judgement, to STDs and so on.
Engaging in premarital sex clouds your perspective and makes you shallow. You cease focusing on the very important and necessary things because your hormones would have clouded your lenses.
Today, I’ll be talking strictly about premarital sex (fornication) and extramarital (adultery) because I’m not married yet and I don’t feel authorized to talk about it.
All things being equal, a Christian relationship should end up in marriage and not just any marriage but a marriage that brings glory to God. And so values that are consistent with God’s Word are built from the relationship level.
No No No. It doesn’t work like that. Building a godly home, starts from a godly relationship.
It is very important to be physically attracted to your partner and if this is in place, then there definitely will be days when you want to give way to the flesh and just have sex. This is why you must intentionally put systems in place to ensure that this does not happen.
Also, if you’re already involved in premarital sex, it’s not the end of the world. It’s not too late to make a new decision. Go before God in repentance and start on a new note.
Below are a few ways to maintain or start practicing abstinence in your Christian relationship.
It starts with God and You
You can not do this by your strength, so you must acknowledge your humanity and weakness before God and ask Him to help you.
I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.
Romans 12:1 KJV
You and your partner should be on the same page.
Set specific boundaries.
Avoid creating the atmosphere.
A pastor friend of mine said “Sex is spontaneously easy to fall into, so don’t create the environment to begin with.”
Oh, let me warn you, sisters in Jerusalem, by the gazelles, yes, by all the wild deer: Don’t excite love, don’t stir it up, until the time is ripe—and you’re ready. Song of Solomon 2:7 MSG
Channel the vibe elsewhere
Finally, pray together, often.
Have you read these? : Kissing in a Christian Relationship
Lord, we give You thanks for our beautiful friendship and relationship. We come before you today in repentance from any way we have dishonored You in our relationship, especially with our bodies. We make the decision today to stay chaste, holy and celibate, honoring You with our body and we ask that You help us. Thank You for Your Love that is ever with us and for Your Grace that strengthens us to do Your will. In Jesus’ Name we pray.